The Nutty Side Of Sonics Memorabilia

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An Ebay.com search for “SuperSonics” turns up more than 110,000 results. Sure, a few are for a furry blue hedgehog or fast-food drive-in, but that’s still a lot of memorabilia for the busy Sonics fan to wade through. So we’ve done it for you, collecting some of the most noteworthy, unusual, or in a few cases, confusing items related to the team. Enjoy!

Accessories

Our first item is described as “1976 Seattle Super Sonics (Avon Decanter) Basketball Bracing Lotion.” Basically, bracing lotion is a fancy name for after-shave. But if you purchase this product, the real bracing you’ll have to do is after you take a whiff of a mixture that’s been marinating for half a century.

Next, an officially licensed by the NBA tote bag. What they neglected to officially license was spell-checkers… unless the city of Seattle used to be spelled differently.

The “Go Sonics” pom-pom is perfectly functional to wave while cheering. It can also serve as a head covering should you neglect to wash your hair.

Two notes about the vintage gold “World Champs” T-shirt: it’ll set you back a hundred bucks or more – and needs ironing.

Posters

Gerald Henderson is the “G-Man.” Since G-man is also slang for “Government Man,” Henderson is posed as a federal agent. Because nothing screams excitement like an open file cabinet.

Hersey Hawkins stars in one of those youth growth chart posters. For added fun, you can measure your hand and foot size against Hawkins’. Thankfully, no other appendages are made available for comparison.

Don’t think too hard about the Gary Payton poster. You might start wondering about the awkward way his body is contorted, and what he’ll do once he either steps on the ball or smothers it like a hand grenade.

They’re Real Dolls

For those who prefer their Gary Payton in other forms, consider this nesting doll. Hand-painted, it’s a “steal” for $17.95. Gary does appear to be wondering how effective he can be without arms.

Gary does have arms in Lego form, but he’s at risk for block-ing fouls. Payton made a cameo in one of the Lego movies, hence the action figure.

The cute if squat individual at right is actually a coin bank. If you started saving your pennies when this was new, maybe you could afford to bring an expansion Sonics team back to Seattle (probably not).

Pin It To Win It

Remember when “In It To Win It” was the Sonics’ slogan? Well, it was. Anyway, Sonic Fever is pretty straightforward as a pin.

Not so much with the button showing the team’s first mascot, The Wheedle – also known, on this pin, as T. Wheedle. He wore a number “0” jersey and a headband almost as well as Slick Watts. Come to think of it, could anyone be more the anti-Slick than this fuzzy creature?

The Sonics through their history played at many home arenas – at Seattle Center, on the U-Dub campus, at the Kingdome, in Tacoma, then back to the renamed Key Arena. This strange pin asks “Where are they going to play?” I ask, “Who would wear this?”

The question turned out to be, pardon the expression, a hot-button issue again in the 2000s. Lack of what the NBA considered a suitable arena led to the league saying OK for the Sonics to move to OKC in 2008.

Galoob’s All-Star MVP Poseable Action Figures

Seattle was one of six NBA teams to be immortalized by a Galoob action figure set. The Sonics’ starting five included Shawn Kemp, Gary Payton, Sam Perkins, Hersey Hawkins, and Detlef Schrempf.

I just hope they remembered to poke air holes in this thing.

From the back of the box: “Play above the rim with the sizzling superstars of the NBA! Galoob’s All-Star MVPs let you drive to the hoop or set up for the alley oop. With these superstar players, you can set up all-star games or triple-overtime thrillers. Start your own quest for the championship ring!”

Unfortunately, only the action figure Shawn Kemp was still in Seattle by the time these reached stores. Before the 1997-98 season, the Reign Man was traded to Cleveland in a three-team deal that sent Vin Baker from Milwaukee to Seattle.